I dedicate this Random Day to my friend Sophie.

Things you can do in a parking lot while you’re waiting for someone else to get to the office because you forgot your keys:

  • Play games on your phone.
  • Text people who have nothing better to do than post a blog that 12 people read (but one of them might be Chris Hardwick, so shut your filthy mouth).
  • Stalk your enemies on facebook.
  • Kick rocks.
  • Check that your tires have the proper amount of air in them.
  • Short nap.
  • Pick a flower and play “he loves me, he loves me not” (just make sure the flower has an odd number of petals).
  • Run to the store to buy some sidewalk chalk and start decorating.
  • Test how secure your office really is by breaking a window or two.
  • Look for penis-shaped clouds in the sky.
  • Prank call some people.
  • Make yourself an impromptu breakfast using only what you find in your car – several sonic mints and half a pack of cigarettes.
  • Contemplate your existence.
  • Write “Don’t wash me, I like to be dirty” in the dirt on someone’s window.
  • Call in sick and go back to bed.

There you go, Soph. Plenty of options.

(If anyone has some better options, please leave them in the comments.)

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